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Showing posts with label Living as the Body of Christ. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Living as the Body of Christ. Show all posts

Tuesday, August 14, 2012

Neediness in the Family of God

The audio from my husband, Kristian Ellefsen's, sermon on the "Children of God" from August 5th is available here: http://www.thecoramdeofellowship.org/resources/sermon-audio/Kristian preached on how God calls us to be needy.

This sermon got me thinking about a lot of things. One of them is church culture.

By “needy”, Kristian is not talking about being demanding of others to meet our needs. He is not talking about idolizing people or allowing or expecting people to fill a role that only God was meant to fill in our lives. He is not talking about an obsession with self or an unhealthy introspection. He is not talking about selfish excuses not to love and humbly serve those around us. He is not talking about laziness or suggesting we do not seek to work hard and excel in the things that we are called and equipped by God to do. Rather, he is talking about a humble posture that acknowledges that we do not exist apart from God’s sovereign hand. We need Him for everything. We were created to need Him. And an important way that God administers His grace, love, and help to us is through each other!

Being needy tends to be a negative term in our culture and even in churches--especially the longer you are a Christian and especially if you are in leadership. It is just one of the ways the church has borrowed secular business principles in a way that is not consistent with living as the family of God. Drive or ambition that is funneled through self-sufficiency and individualism is something that is prized in the business world and the competition that it breeds often leads to tremendous innovation.

And yet, the Bible presents a radically different way of living where we are called to humility and an acknowledgment of our dependence on God firstly, but also we are told that we were created to rely on one another as we image Him to each other and administer His grace to each other. While at times our “achievements” and feelings of independence in life can deceive us into thinking we are self-sufficient, Acts 17 tells us that we depend on God for even the most basic human act of breathing! And 1 Corinthians 12 and 1 Peter 4:10 are examples of how we need each other in the Body of Christ.

In church culture, sometimes we look down on those in the Body who appear “needy” or “high maintenance”, as if those who need are somehow less spiritual or have less faith than those who are “put together” or those who have learned to “feed themselves”. (Interestingly, the people Jesus hung out with during His life on earth were what we could recognize as needy!) Sometimes we ignore our neediness because it is too much for us to do deal with--either because it is too painful or to wearisome to ourselves and others. (If we tire of our own selves, how much more will we tire the "friends" around us.)  Sometimes neediness is figuratively beaten out of people in churches through “tough love” measures. Sometimes we distract ourselves from our neediness (knowingly and unknowingly) with so many things that we become blind or apathetic toward our own great need. We even get distracted by good things like leading and serving others.  Sometimes we are deluded into thinking others are more “put together” due to a church culture where we hide our sin and mess from each other out of fear of looking bad or being rejected or shunned by the Body. And in particular for men in the church, there is sometimes an over-compensation against the sinful passivity of men in the church where now the pendulum has swung the other way and “Biblical” masculinity is presented more like a caricature of tough, emotionless, sports-loving, meat-eating, testosterone pumped “dudes” rather what we see in Scripture (for example, Scriptures that address men specifically--like Ephesians 5:25-33 or 1 Timothy 3:1-7 or Titus 2—or Scriptures that talk about the fruit of the Spirit in general, or even Scriptures that point us to the example Jesus modeled (!). In Jesus, we see such strength and tenderness, such power and humility, such emotion and sharpness of mind, and such a strong dependence on the Father. Interestingly, these traits are treasures in women too!). And yet men in the church are often shamed out of acknowledging or displaying neediness of almost any kind.

I have noticed that the Christians who have most impacted me with their faith-backed wisdom and example are Christians who are aware of their brokenness. Many of these Christians have walked through circumstances of suffering or struggles with sin or weaknesses (much like the “thorn” that Paul references) that have taught them of their own need. Frequently (but not always) they are Christians who have walked in faith for much longer than I have. These are Christians who have such a strong and beautiful glimpse of the great sacrificial love and grace by which the God of the Universe saved His rebellious creation (i.e. all of us!). They are slower to judge those around them for this reason and are quicker to show compassion and tenderness without compromising truth. These are Christians who live out and out of the grace they have experienced in Christ and in their need of Him. These Christians are like a breath of fresh air. Instead of pointing me to themselves or to the law, they point me to the freedom and hope that they have found in Christ. They point me to the heart of love that my Heavenly Father has for me without sugar coating my sin, minimizing the pain in the struggles of life, or making much of themselves. They are not full of platitudes or Pharisaical and self-righteous remarks. They are not characterized by boasting or self-deprecation. They are not afraid to share from the messiness of their lives. Rather, their brokenness and awareness of their need before God has produced a quiet and steady confidence and hope in God that is grounded in humility. As they have acknowledged their need before God, God has filled these Christians with His love—both with His love for them but also with authentic affection and love for those around them—even those of us who are the most inconvenient or hardest to love. God uses these Christians to show His love and grace and to create an environment where others feel safe to express their need too. One of these dear saints in our lives frequently tells us “I am not going anywhere”. This friend understands steadfastness and perseverance in love. And in doing so, this friend has imaged God’s love to us in such a beautiful and powerful and life impactful way.

I pray for God to mold me and mature me like this too!

If you want another example of the posture of godly neediness that I am talking about, a great book to read is “The Practice of the Presence of God” by Brother Lawrence. Here it is on amazon.com:

http://www.amazon.com/The-Practice-Presence-Brother-Lawrence/dp/1475289812/ref=sr_1_2?ie=UTF8&qid=1345010134&sr=8-2&keywords=brother+lawrence


To go directly to Kristian’s sermon on neediness, click here: http://my.ekklesia360.com/Clients/sermonaudioplayer.php?CMSCODE=EKK&siteid=2806&sermonid=439463&useSkin=skin_plain.xml&CMS_LINK=http%3A%2F%2Fmy.ekklesia360.com




Acts 17:24-25 ESV “The God who made the world and everything in it, being Lord of heaven and earth, does not live in temples made by man, nor is he served by human hands, as though he needed anything, since he himself gives to all mankind life and breath and everything.”         



1 Corinthians 12:12-27 “For just as the body is one and has many members, and all the members of the body, though many, are one body, so it is with Christ. For in one Spirit we were all baptized into one body—Jews or Greeks, slaves or free—and all were made to drink of one Spirit.

For the body does not consist of one member but of many. If the foot should say,“Because I am not a hand, I do not belong to the body,” that would not make it any less a part of the body. And if the ear should say, “Because I am not an eye, I do not belong to the body,” that would not make it any less a part of the body. If the whole body were an eye, where would be the sense of hearing? If the whole body were an ear, where would be the sense of smell? But as it is, God arranged the members in the body, each one of them, as he chose. If all were a single member, where would the body be? As it is, there are many parts, yet one body.

The eye cannot say to the hand, “I have no need of you,” nor again the head to the feet, “I have no need of you.” On the contrary, the parts of the body that seem to be weaker are indispensable, and on those parts of the body that we think less honorable we bestow the greater honor, and our unpresentable parts are treated with greater modesty, which our more presentable parts do not require. But God has so composed the body, giving greater honor to the part that lacked it, that there may be no division in the body, but that the members may have the same care for one another. If one member suffers, all suffer together; if one member is honored, all rejoice together.

Now you are the body of Christ and individually members of it.”

1 Peter 4:8-11 ESV “Above all, keep loving one another earnestly, since love covers a multitude of sins. Show hospitality to one another without grumbling. As each has received a gift, use it to serve one another, as good stewards of God's varied grace: whoever speaks, as one who speaks oracles of God; whoever serves, as one who serves by the strength that God supplies—in order that in everything God may be glorified through Jesus Christ. To him belong glory and dominion forever and ever. Amen.”

Sunday, March 25, 2012

Reconciled

I love the C.S. Lewis book, “The Lion, The Witch, and the Wardrobe”.  Outside of the Bible, it may be the book that best illustrated to me what the gospel really means.  When Edmund betrays Aslan and the “deep magic from the dawn of time,” the price of that treason must be paid in order to preserve justice and goodness.  And yet out of goodness, love, and a heart to be in unhindered relationship with Edmund, the powerful, majestic, perfectly good Aslan, although innocent, humbles himself and willingly pays the high price of Edmund’s treason.  Aslan’s painful and perfect sacrifice defeats death itself and makes a way for Edmund to live and to be in relationship with Aslan.  Edmund and Aslan are reconciled.  This brings great joy and peace to Edmund.

The gospel is all about the fact that we, through the death of Jesus, are reconciled to our perfect and good God—in whom is our every delight! 
In light of this gospel, as Christians we should live with a heart towards reconciliation with our brothers and sisters.  Yet over and over again as Christians and as churches, how many times do we take the path of least resistance when conflict arises---allowing relationships to fizzle out, breaking off relationships altogether, self-righteously judging from afar, aligning ourselves with the popular majority, building walls around our hearts…rather than doing the hard work of love.  These are our instincts.  These are my instincts (most especially in marriage).  How this dishonors the gospel that saved me!
Love pursues, love engages, love acts, and love hopes…even if it requires great sacrifice (and it usually does).

Dear Lord, convict our stubborn hearts!  Open our eyes where we are blind.  Help us to see where we are dishonoring the gospel of love!  Fill us with the Spirit that we would have your eyes and your love for others, even those we find difficult to love and even when it costs us greatly to love.  Give us the power, courage and conviction to do the hard work of love.  May we be so rooted in your sacrificial and grace filled love that loving others in the same way becomes more and more natural to us.  In Jesus name, Amen

Friday, March 23, 2012

Sin in the Church

I am a Christian, and my husband can tell you with confidence that I still sin regularly!  By this I mean that I live, believe, and act outside of my identity in Christ and outside of the way I learned in Him.  Sometimes I do this unknowingly and in accordance with my natural instincts, and other times I do this consciously—quite aware that my thoughts and behaviors conflict with Christ’s character.  Our life (our thoughts, actions, inaction, etc.) flows out from our heart.  Yes, because I have sought refuge—acknowledged my sin and helplessness apart from Jesus, believed in Jesus and the penalty He paid on the cross for my sin, and I have given my life to Him—I am free from the eternal consequences of my sin (i.e. I am no longer separated from God, but rather I joyfully get to live as a daughter of the Almighty, Holy, Good, Loving God forever).  But still, as I walk on this earth, there are places in my heart that are still plagued with all sorts of things that have nothing to do with Jesus’ way--doubt, fear, bitterness, selfish ambition, pride, etc.   And yet, every day that I walk with Jesus, He is transforming my heart—setting it free day by day.  I still regularly go to God in prayer, confessing my sin, and confessing my struggles and the areas of my life that I find it so difficult to change.  I ask for forgiveness, I ask for God’s power—for His love to change me.  I look at the life of Jesus in the Word.  I seek prayer and counsel from my brothers and sisters in Christ who love Jesus and His Word.   I listen (not always well admittedly) to trusted friends who see destructive patterns in my life that I do not always see, and I seek help.  And God patiently and lovingly is changing me.  I love this verse:  “And we all, with unveiled face, beholding the glory of the Lord, are being transformed into the same image from one degree of glory to another.  For this comes from the Lord who is the Spirit.” (2 Corinthians 3:18 ESV)
I write all of this publicly because I have been set free from shame.  It does not matter if others find me foolish and weak.   I stand and fall before God not men.  And I am able to stand before God because Jesus is good and perfect and He paid for my sin. I do not want to pretend to be better than I am for many reasons—it is exhausting, I will fail, it is not truthful or real, it produces despair in the lives of others around me who are aware of their own struggles, and I will be exposed for my hypocrisy when I do fail.  Most importantly, I want the gospel to shine through me.  The gospel is the good news about God—that He is good and that He rescues!  The gospel assumes sin—we need rescuing!  As others see my sin and failure, may they also see the God on whom I rely!  May they also see the God who forgives greatly!  May they also see the changes that He is graciously making in me!  May they also see love that is not of this world—the love I have seen and experienced in Him, the love that has changed every fiber of my life!!!!  This is not “be nice to those who are nice to you” kind of love.  This is the kind of love that does not returning evil for evil.  This is the kind of love that forgives big and small things.  This is the kind of love that fights for the lost and for the oppressed.  This is the kind of love that sacrifices greatly in the interest of another.  This is the kind of love that gives even when there is no ability to return.  This is the kind of love that pursues.  This is the kind of love that makes a way for reconciliation.  This is the kind of love that humbles itself.  This is the kind of love that would drive the God of the Universe to pursue His wayward creation in love, to make a way to live in relationship with His Beloved but wayward creation that would not compromise His perfect justice and goodness!  This is the kind of love that would drive the God of the universe to pay the price of sin and rebellion Himself, by stooping down to come to this earth in the frailty of human flesh and to endure the penalty of sin—death and separation from God!

We need only open the newspaper to see that Christians and churches still sin in pretty horrific ways.  We are not called to hide our sin from the world, to lie about it, or cover it up (the effects of that can be ghastly and tragic—look at the sexual abuse in the churches that has been perpetuated by sinful cover ups!).  We are called to live out the gospel!!!  We are called to live in the light and in truth and in love, not to cower or throw stones from afar!  We are called to humbly confess our sin and to go to God and to each other for help!!  We are called to help our brothers and sisters who are in sin.  We are called to faithfully pray, to lovingly pursue, and to sacrificially act.  We are called to protect anyone who is being harmed or abused by another person’s sin.  We are called to live in the light so that the darkness, hiding, secrets, and cover-ups do not beget more sin!!  In this process, the gospel does its work!  In this process, the world can see the love that won us to our Savior. 

“A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another: just as I have loved you, you also are to love one another. By this all people will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another.” (John 13:34-35 ESV)

Wednesday, November 16, 2011

Activism

I’m an activist at heart.  I feel my blood boil when I think of the powerful exploiting the weak, the many taking advantage of the few, or the privileged oppressing the less privileged.   This does not always result in godliness in me.  It can lead me to speaking too quickly (selfishly wanting to "unload" and not lovingly and prayerfully discerning timing--which is important even when speaking what is true) and not resting in God's timing and plan (sinfully trying to control, being impatient, not trusting in God, and becoming judgmental of my brother).    And too often, my frustration with injustice can sinfully lead me to bitterness or misplaced hope.  This inevitably results when I allow my anger and brokenhearted-ness to be divorced from the perspective of eternal gospel hope in Christ. Accordingly, I have to acknowledge, guard against, and fight against these propensities toward sin in myself.  The best way for me to do this to be rooted in the gospel—the reality that:
1)      I, along with my fellow human beings, have betrayed the only good, perfect, almighty, all-loving, all wise, creator God;

2)      the just penalty of this betrayal and subsequent defilement is death and separation from a Perfect God;

3)      our God is so good and loves us so much that He sacrificed Himself for us, paying the just penalty of our sin so that we could be with Him forever if we believe in Him and follow Him in faith;

4)      He gives us access to Him, not just in the future in heaven, but also right now through His Word and His Spirit and through prayer; 

5)      He is changing us from the inside out, giving us faith, new desires, and power to follow Him;

6)      God is working all things in this world for His glory and the good of His people, in such a way that our character will be in line with His, what is wrong will be righted, and the pain of this life will seem like a “light and momentary affliction” when compared to the “eternal weight of glory” that He is bringing about through the things of this life.

When I am rooted in this gospel (which means “good news”), I can seek the Lord’s counsel and wait on Him, trusting His sovereignty, wisdom, goodness, and power despite the horrors I see in my heart and in this world.  When I am rooted in the gospel, I can trust that He is at work in my heart and the hearts of my brothers and sisters, even when I do not understand or even when I can see blatant sin.  When I am rooted in the gospel, I can acknowledge the afflictions of life and yet not be consumed by them because I already have the all surpassing joy of knowing Jesus and I have great hope in what He is doing that my eye cannot see.  When I am rooted in the gospel, I can have love, compassion, forgiveness, hope and peace for those who sin against and harm me or others. 
Obviously, none of us are purely activists all the time or purely those who wait all the time, but most of us have a tendency towards one of these directions.  And one propensity is not better than the other.  What about you, where do you fall?  Are you an activist too, or do your tendencies swing in the other direction?  The godly side of not having an activist tendency can be mercifulness, forbearance, patience, faith, peacefulness, and gentleness.  These are godly, honorable, and precious qualities that we all should seek to cultivate!  However, some of the propensities towards sin for those who do not have activist personalities can be apathy, selfishness, laziness, partiality, fear of man and other things, and lack of faith and love that is unwilling to speak truth or to do hard things or to stand up for others until our own well-being is on the line.  Again, the answer to the propensity towards sin here is still the gospel.  The gospel gives us power to love as Christ loves.  When we apathetically or fearfully fail to stand up for or reach out to our brother, we fail to love our brother—this same person who was lovingly made in the image and likeness of God and for whom Jesus gave His precious life!! This is no small sin!  Yet, Christ demonstrates to us a different way! When we were without hope in our sin, Christ, out of His great love, stood up and did something for us!  God spoke out to us and for us!  He reached out to us. He loved us at great cost to Himself.  Christ did the hard things of faith and love-- forsaking His reputation, comfort, privilege, etc. to rescue those who betrayed Him.  Christ did not follow the powerful or popular or winsome.  He invested in and even stood up for the “nobodies” of this world—those who were obviously imperfect and despised or rejected or not even noticed by the “somebodies” of His time.   Christ did not throw away or abandon the sinful and imperfect.  Christ allowed His reputation to be maligned and slandered by spiteful and/or ignorant lies for the sake of rescuing the lost.  Christ endured great persecution so that He could win our salvation.  Christ spoke the truth, even though He knew He would suffer for it. His example in the gospel compels us to love in this way.  From the Old Testament to the New, the Scriptures repeatedly and explicitly direct us to love in this way!

My dear friend, Wendy, wrote an excellent blog that talks more about the phenomenon “when good men do nothing”.  It can be found here:


I have also posted her full blog article, “When Good Men Do Nothing” below. 

Here is a blogpost of mine that speaks a little to this theme as well:


Heavenly Father, Thank you for the gospel!!  Thank you that it is the answer for us, no matter who we are and no matter what strengths or weaknesses and sin we possess.  Father, give us humble hearts to soberly assess ourselves and our character.  Speak into our lives with your truth.  Speak to us about ways that our heart and life are not in line with your gospel.  Show us specific situations in our life where you are calling us to repentance.  Show us what repentance looks like and give us the strength to obey where you lead, even if it comes at great cost to ourselves.  Fill our hearts with gospel love for those around us.  Protect us from sinning against our brother and displaying a lack of love through bitterness, judgmental-ness, or a lack of gospel faith and hope.  Protect us from sinning against our brother and displaying a lack of love by failing to act, failing to stand up against injustice, failing to reach out to those who are suffering, and by simply being apathetic.  Help us to be rooted and established in gospel love.  As you teach us about yourself and mature us, may your work be demonstrated in us through ever increasing love for you, for our family and friends, for our neighbors, for strangers, and even for those who have harmed us.  Give us this radical love.  Awaken your church and forgive your church for our apathy and rebellion.  Fill us with courage and faith and power.  Help us to live in the hope and freedom of the gospel!!  In Jesus Name, Amen

From Wendy’s blog:


When Good Men Do Nothing

"All that is necessary for the triumph of evil is that good men do nothing." Edmund Burke

It's been painful to watch the fallout of the Penn State sexual abuse scandal. The subject has inspired numerous Christian blog posts. One of the best I have read is from a Penn State Campus Crusade for Christ staffer. You can read it here. Probably enough has been said, yet unraveling the answer to the question of what causes good men and women to do nothing at times in the face of evil seems important to me.

I love football and have respected Joe Paterno as a coach over the years. It saddens me to see his incredible career end in such a way. What saddens me most is that I think, in terms of character, Joe Paterno is a respectable man. Yet, this respectable man allowed a very bad thing to go on under his nose. And not just him – there's a whole slew of men who should have known better who allowed the worst kind of abuse of a minor to happen on their watch. They closed their ears and turned away. How did that happen?!

Some have expressed concern about how Paterno and others have been treated in the wake of the allegations. I think this stems in part from the disturbing idea for many of us that we might have reacted exactly the same way. We too might have wrestled for days over what to report to higher ups and how to paint what we did report. We too might have let it go after doing the bare minimum needed to ease our conscience. I could easily see myself at certain stages of my life numbing my conscience on the issue with words like “Well, I reported it to my authority. I did what was required of me. I can't help it if they don't do more. I've done my responsibility.”

Penn State's football program is legendary. Joe Paterno ran a tight ship. The men in charge of that program--Athletic Director, Coach, Offensive Coordinator, Defensive Coordinator, and so forth--were respected and revered. They were obeyed. It was not unlike authoritarian church and ministry structures with which I have been involved over the years. In those systems, the good guys are the ones who respect authority. They buck it up and contribute even when they dislike an order. Respect, cooperation, and obedience to your superiors are fundamental to the entire system. I have empathy for the young graduate assistant who first witnessed his boss raping a minor in the locker room. I'm sure he was shocked and horrified. What do you do when your authority in this authoritarian system is the one doing this act? The GA didn't intervene. And I fear that when I was his age, I may not have intervened either. At least not immediately. Now 41 years old and the mother of children myself, no one could stop me if I witnessed that today. But back then, I valued respect of authority so much that I fear I would have been paralyzed in the moment, to my life long regret.

The graduate assistant finally told his dad, and his dad helped him tell Coach Paterno. Both seemed to meet their minimum legal requirement. Yet neither stopped the cycle of abuse that continued for several more years. Why? The Campus Crusade pastor points out in his article the deficiency of love for the victim. That is the fundamental, root issue. But a secondary issue is that they all thought they had more to lose by standing up strongly for the victims than they did by protecting the program. Obviously, they were very, very wrong and have lost much more by covering it up. The urge to stand up for a little guy none of them knew faded in the shadow of the behemoth that was the Penn State football program.

Good men do nothing a lot. Good women too. We do nothing sometimes out of self protection. But more often, I think we do nothing because we value protecting authoritarian systems more than we do standing up for the victim. I've experienced this before in various Christian ministries—a leader with authority does wrong. But the reputation of the institution and those associated with it seems more important than seeking justice for the one abused or oppressed. I could write out a long list of names of good men and women I know personally, men and women of proven character and good reputation, who did not stand up for victims and instead protected a program or ministry. I've done it myself at times. Rocking the boat didn't seem a Christian virtue in that moment.

Though good church people often value submission to authority over advocacy for the oppressed, God is clear on what we need to do with abusive authority.


Isaiah 1:17
17learn to do good;
seek justice,
correct oppression;
bring justice to the fatherless,
plead the widow’s cause.

Psalm 82:3
Give justice to the weak and the fatherless;
maintain the right of the afflicted and the destitute.

Psalm 10:18
to do justice to the fatherless and the oppressed,
so that man who is of the earth may strike terror no more.

Proverbs 31:9
Open your mouth, judge righteously,
defend the rights of the poor and needy.


God calls us to step up for the poor and defenseless. Be aware of our propensity to turn away and hear clearly God's command to engage. And if you have been silent or turned away, humble yourself and make it right. If the gospel is truly our foundation in Christian ministry, we have hope for redemption and transformation when we choose humble responses that seek to correct our mistakes. Humble repentance, not defensiveness, is the absolute key to dealing with past failures, and meditation on God's strong admonition to do justice for the oppressed is key for the future.


Monday, September 26, 2011

Church Building

Kristian and I have been blessed to be on a trip of a lifetime in Italy.  Even as I type this, stunning scenes of Italian countryside flash by us on the train that we are riding to Northern Italy. One of our favorite places so far has been Rome.  I have been to Rome before, but this was Kristian’s first time.  I had as much fun watching him experience it all for the first time, as I did experiencing the sights for myself again.  But no matter how many times you have seen St. Peter’s Basilica, it is breathtaking every time….the massive size, the intricate details, the skill of its craftsmanship, the lavish materials, the beauty of the artwork, the thought of all of the years it has seen, the thought of all the worshippers it has contained….What an amazing feat it must have been to construct such a masterpiece, especially in a day that was void of the technology we now enjoy.   

Man is capable of many amazing feats because of the gifts God has given.  The work of man can be flashy, impressive, massive, loud, exciting, fun, and crowd-producing.  St Peter’s Basilica is a testament to the fact that man can build truly magnificent church buildings.  In some of the business meetings I have been able to attend with Kristian, we have heard stories of great entrepreneurship—where, out of nothing, talented and winsome men have built impressive multi-million dollar international companies, providing livelihoods for hundreds of families.  And I need only flip on the television in our hotel room to see how people who once were “nobodys” in this world have now acquired great fame and following for themselves.

For some reason, all of these things got me thinking about growing a church.  Maybe it is because we had our church retreat right before we left for Italy.  In the middle of the whirlwind of our trip, I sat down and opened my Bible to Ephesians 4.  I was struck by how God, by His Spirit, builds a church. 

And he gave the apostles, the prophets, the evangelists, the shepherds and teachers,  12 to equip the saints for the work of ministry, for building up the body of Christ, 13 until we all attain to the unity of the faith and of the knowledge of the Son of God, to mature manhood, to the measure of the stature of the fullness of Christ, 14 so that we may no longer be children, tossed to and fro by the waves and carried about by every wind of doctrine, by human cunning, by craftiness in deceitful schemes. 15 Rather, speaking the truth in love, we are to grow up in every way into him who is the head, into Christ, 16 from whom the whole body, joined and held together by every joint with which it is equipped, when each part is working properly, makes the body grow so that it builds itself up in love.” 

There is no talent, no strategy, no act of man apart from God’s Spirit that can build a church like this!  Church “growth” here is attaining unity of faith and knowledge of Jesus, maturing to the measure of the stature of the fullness of Christ, growing up into our head who is Christ, and being built up in love.  
There is no mention here of church attendance, or giving amounts, which are usually the measures of growth used in churches today.  There is no mention of innovative church programs, charismatic speakers, a particular type of music, or strategic locations.  The image here is a unified Body where every part is stewarding his or her gifts and lovingly speaking the truth of the gospel in such a way as the Body grows in maturity that is marked by love.  This kind of growth may or may not be in impressive numbers in any particular church, but this is kingdom growth—the kind that will truly transform hearts at home and in the world.

This reminded me that, although man can do so many marvelous things, the truly lasting fruit of this world is only Holy Spirit-wrought.  The Bible tells us that much of what we see will fade like the grass.  The work of God’s Spirit remains.  The work of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, gentleness, and self control.  Spirit work is humble, peace-loving, full of grace that bears with one another in love, and committed to unity in the Spirit.  If God’s Spirit is the driving force in a movement or in a work, no matter how massive or tiny, it will look like this.  There are many works of men cloaked in pious words...history has shown us that men have  done many horrific things in “God’s name” and for “ministry”, all the while mistreating each other, stepping on one another, sacrificing one another, turning a blind eye to injustice, boasting, pursuing selfish gain, ignoring correction, and harming others.  But the hallmark fruit of the Spirit is gospel love—love that is pure, enduring, humble, and sacrificial.

If any of these thoughts have stirred your heart too, let me encourage you towards these Scriptures as you process and pray: Ephesians 4; 1 Cor 12-12; Galatians 5.

Oh, Lord, build these kind of churches among us!  May we seek to participate in these types of churches—where growth is measured in terms of maturing in you, in the truth of your gospel, and in scandalous gospel love amongst one another!!  Where our hearts are motivated by other things, correct us and bring us to repentance.  Open our eyes!!! Father, we confess our shortsightedness and arrogance and the harm it has caused to our brother.  We confess being dazzled and distracted by the things of this world and all the while missing the marvelous way you have wanted to show us.  Help us to seek peace and unity and the good of one another.  Where we have used one another, failed to stand up for one another, failed to seek each other out, failed to act justly with one another, or failed to do the hard things of love, please forgive us and help us to seek out those against whom we have sinned.  Where we have been damaged, help us to forgive.  Help us be healed and restored and help us to be a hand of healing and restoration of others, even when it costs us.  Create in us a new heart.  Create in us new clean motives.  Fill us with your measure of fruitfulness and let us not get distracted by our flesh and by what we see around us.  Fill us with your love, the kind of love that will change our lives and this world!  Help us to remain steadfast in your truth and love.  In Jesus Name, Amen

Monday, August 1, 2011

In the Name of Jesus

Along with the rest of the world, I was horrified to hear of the bombing in Oslo and the subsequent shooting spree at a youth camp nearby.   These massacres hit a little closer to home for us, since my husband is from Norway.  Thankfully, all of our family members are all right, but our hearts ache for Norway and especially for the loved ones of those who lost their lives and for the traumatized survivors, many of whom were just kids.  It is all so unthinkable.

Listening to the news reports, I was further disgusted to hear that the perpetrator of these atrocities justify his actions by his “Christian” beliefs.   Obviously, the Bible condemns his acts of hatred and destruction.  But it did get me thinking….
Those of us who call ourselves “Christian” often times don’t really represent Christ well. 

This past Sunday, our pastor, Scott Golike, preached on this section of Ephesians:
Ephesians 2

And you were dead in the trespasses and sins 2 in which you once walked, following the course of this world, following the prince of the power of the air, the spirit that is now at work in the sons of disobedience— 3 among whom we all once lived in the passions of our flesh, carrying out the desires of the body and the mind, and were by nature children of wrath, like the rest of mankind. 4 But God, being rich in mercy, because of the great love with which he loved us, 5 even when we were dead in our trespasses, made us alive together with Christ—by grace you have been saved— 6 and raised us up with him and seated us with him in the heavenly places in Christ Jesus, 7 so that in the coming ages he might show the immeasurable riches of his grace in kindness toward us in Christ Jesus. 8 For by grace you have been saved through faith. And this is not your own doing; it is the gift of God, 9 not a result of works, so that no one may boast. 10 For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them.
You can hear the sermon here:
As a congregation, we had some good discussion afterward about why we have a hard time grasping the fact that we are dead in our trespasses apart from Christ.  I admitted that my difficulty in believing this is because I know many people who don’t believe in Christ who seem much more loving than me and others who do profess faith in Christ.  I know that, believer or not, we are all made in the image of God.  Believer or not, we are all fallen.  But I would think that after experiencing the ultimate display of sacrificial love at the cross and after having been filled the Holy Spirit, that we Christians would be more loving than we often are. 
During our discussion in church, one person brought up the excellent point that we blaspheme God by our conduct—we are called to be image bearers of Him and yet in many ways, our lives are not in accord with His ways--with sound doctrine. 

Why is that we Christians can be so arrogant, proud, lacking in compassion, apathetic, judgmental, un-teachable, cliquey, and simply bad friends when we are supposed to be characterized by Christ's sacrificial love?  Well, one reason is that we are fallen and that we are still in the process of being sanctified (the process of being conformed to the character of Christ by the Holy Spirit).  I think another reason is that we forget Ephesians 2!  We forget that we haven’t figured it all out.  We forget where we came from—that we were ALL dead in our trespasses apart from Christ and that is by grace that we have been saved—not of our own doing, but by the gift of God.  We learn some things and then we become puffed up by our knowledge—our hearts are no longer teachable, especially when God is speaking to us through people we find somehow inferior to ourselves (younger, older,  less mature, less authority, not as cool, not as smart, has a different background or opinions, etc).  We forget the simple truths we first learned—like Ephesians 2 or like 1 Corinthians 13.   Or maybe we don’t even forget them, but we foolishly think we’ve outgrown them?  Or maybe we forget that we have the Spirit’s power and instead we just think these teachings are just too hard?  Or maybe we misguidedly believe that there are more important things we can be doing “for Jesus”?  Or maybe we are too busy fussing about our own image and how we look to others?  Or maybe we are too busy looking at how others around us don’t measure up?  Or maybe we become safe and comfortable in our little world?
1 Corinthians 13
If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal. 2 And if I have prophetic powers, and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have all faith, so as to remove mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. 3 If I give away all I have, and if I deliver up my body to be burned but have not love, I gain nothing. 4 Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant 5 or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; 6 it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. 7 Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. 8 Love never ends. As for prophecies, they will pass away; as for tongues, they will cease; as for knowledge, it will pass away. 9 For we know in part and we prophesy in part, 10 but when the perfect comes, the partial will pass away. 11 When I was a child, I spoke like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I gave up childish ways. 12 For now we see in a mirror dimly, but then face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I have been fully known. 13 So now faith, hope, and love abide, these three; but the greatest of these is love.

Father God, forgive me!  Forgive me for the ways I abandon that child-like spirit I once had when I met you.  Forgive me for thinking I am something I am not.  Forgive me for being puffed up.  Forgive me for judging others.  Forgive me for being partial.  Forgive me for being concerned with my own image.  Forgive me for being blasphemous in my conduct, as I am created to image you.  Give me the heart of the Psalmist who said—“O Lord, my heart is not lifted up; my eyes are not raised too high; I do not occupy myself with things too great and too marvelous for me. 2 But I have calmed and quieted my soul, like a weaned child with its mother; like a weaned child is my soul within me.”  Our hope is in you—not in ourselves or our circumstances or our accomplishments.  Our desire is to live according to your desire, and not according to our flesh or this world.  Teach me your love!!  Fill me with your sincere unforced love!!  Help me and help us, your Church, to look more and more like you. I pray this especially for the American church and for our unique struggles in this area.  Open our eyes.  Help us to repent where needed.  Father, I also pray for the loved ones of those who were lost in the acts of terror in Norway and for the survivors who will never be the same.  Speak to them where they are.  Bring them comfort and healing.  Show them your love.  Show us all how we can love and help them.  I pray for this for the loved ones of the perpetrator too--as this must be devasting to them as well.  I also pray for the perpetrator--that he would be able to see the ugliness of what he has done and that he would truly seek forgiveness from those whom he has harmed and from you.  I pray that you would work through the Norwegian justice system.  We love you.  In Jesus Name, Amen. 

Saturday, July 30, 2011

Grieiving the Spirit

I read this and found it so helpful.  I hope you do too!! 

http://oubsu.org/pdf/9%20Things%20That%20Grieve%20The%20Holy%20Spirit.pdf

"9 Things That Grieve The Holy Spirit: We can block the Holy Spirit's work without realizing it."


by Lorraine Pintus
Discipleship Journal Issue #91 January/February 1996


"I have no interest in changing my long distance service." The irritation in my voice was unmistakable.


"You mean you don't want to save money?" persisted the saleswoman on the other end of the phone.


I slammed down the receiver and returned to my now cold soup.


"That's the third time they've called this week, and each time it's been in the middle of dinner," I complained to my husband. "It's so rude."


But I knew the "rude award" belonged to me. That poor telemarketer, desperately dialing numbers in hopes of one positive response . . . she was just doing her job, and I'd blasted her.


Sadly, being rude to her had been easy. I did not know her. Had the caller been a close friend, my attitude would have been more gracious.


There is another Person I have thoughtlessly offended because I did not know Him —the Holy Spirit. Oh, I professed to know Him. Having been a Christian for 15 years, I knew who He was, what He did, even where He lived (Jn. 14:17). In truth, I knew His résumé. I did not know Him.


One morning during my devotions, the Holy Spirit whispered to my heart, Lorraine, you love the Father. Jesus is your friend. Now, wouldn't you like to know Me?


It had never been my intention to resist the Holy Spirit, but by not fully yielding to Him, I had hindered His work in my life. I had observed that emotional responses often accompanied the Spirit's work. This made me nervous. My cognitive faith knew emotions were not always trustworthy. Perhaps that's why I had never fully embraced the Person of the Spirit. I had a slight fear —a mild distrust —of Him.


Now the Spirit was urging me to lay aside my reservations. Obediently, I waved the white flag of my will and surrendered.


My fear was confirmed. Emotion did accompany the work of the Spirit, and, ironically, this proved to be a tremendous blessing!


The Spirit deepened my love for Jesus. Never had I felt such empathy for the lost or had such a compelling desire to train disciples for Christ. Joy punctuated my writing. Passion permeated my teaching. Ministry was no longer a burden —I had a Helper eager to assist me!


The Spirit's constant companionship delighted me. Perhaps that was why I was so devastated when He pulled away.


Grieving the Spirit


One day several friends and I were discussing major changes in my former church. I made a somewhat derogatory comment about a church leader. Suddenly I felt a "lurch" in my spirit, as if something inside me had been ripped away. I knew I'd offended the Spirit, and that He had withdrawn to some far-off corner of my heart. I'd grieved the Spirit in the past, but the intensity of my remorse was new to me. I was sickened by my words, horrified by my arrogance, and saddened that I had hurt the One I loved.


I was grateful for the churning within me. It is impossible to understand grieving the Spirit from a strictly cognitive perspective. Grieving involves deep emotion. The Spirit's sorrow had become my sorrow. I hated sin with a new vengeance and resolved to know the things that grieved the Spirit so I could avoid hurting Him in the future.


As I dove into Scripture, two areas surfaced as being particularly grievous to the Spirit: the actions of the Israelites and the attitudes of the Pharisees. And my study revealed that we are often guilty of the same actions and attitudes.


Old Testament Grieving


The Israelites "rebelled and grieved [God's] Holy Spirit" (Is. 63:10). Psalm 78 documents the actions that prompted God's sorrow.


Forgetting God. "They forgot what he had done, the wonders he had shown them" (Ps. 78:11). God freed the Israelites from captivity, parted the Red Sea, provided bread in the desert, and led His people to a prosperous land. "In spite of all this, they kept on sinning" (Ps. 78:32). God lamented, "Can a mother forget the baby at her breast and have no compassion on the child she has borne? Though she may forget, I will not forget you" (Is. 49:15). But "you deserted the Rock, who fathered you; you forgot the God who gave you birth" (Dt. 32:18).


Grumbling. "They spoke against God" (Ps. 78:19). Daily, God provided the Israelites with the "bread of angels." But they weren't satisfied; they whined for more. Their complaints made God "exceedingly angry" (Num. 11:10). Miriam and Aaron criticized Moses, God's appointed leader. "The anger of the LORD burned against them, and he left them," and Miriam became leprous (Num. 12:9). When God allowed the Israelites to glimpse the glory of the promised land, they grumbled about the great size of the people instead of being grateful for the great size of the grapes. God sighed, "How long will this wicked community grumble against me?" (Num. 14:27).


Disobedience. "They did not keep God's covenant and refused to live by his law" (Ps. 78:10). "Again and again they put God to the test; they vexed the Holy One of Israel" (Ps. 78:41). The Israelites' repeated disobedience saddened God. "How long will you refuse to keep my commands and my instructions?" He asked (Ex. 16:28).


Disbelief. "They did not believe in God or trust in his deliverance" (Ps. 78:22). Ten times God is described in Psalm 78 as being angry, grieved, or vexed. Disturbed by their lack of faith, God cried, "How long will these people treat me with contempt? How long will they refuse to believe
in me, in spite of all the miraculous signs I have performed among them?" (Num. 14:11, emphasis mine).


New Testament Grieving


God's Old Testament warning, "do not grieve the Holy Spirit," is repeated in the New Testament in Eph. 4:30, but the emphasis is different. In the Old Testament, grieving the Spirit was connected to the people's response to God. In the New Testament, grieving the Spirit also includes our response to one another in the Body of Christ. Paul explains this in Eph. 4:29–32 as he illustrates how we can keep from grieving the Spirit: avoid unwholesome talk; build others up rather than yourself; share; rid yourself of bitterness, rage, anger, brawling, and slander; be compassionate.


The consistent goal of the Spirit in the New Testament is that we achieve unity by maintaining right relationships with one another and using our gifts to serve the Body.


Ephesians 4:12–13 says to serve one another "so that the body of Christ may be built up until we all reach unity in the faith." Jesus' final plea before the crucifixion was that we would all be one and "brought to complete unity" (Jn. 17:23). Paul urges in Eph. 4:3, "Make every effort to keep the unity of the Spirit."


But the church in Jesus' day lacked both service and unity, due in large measure to the ruling religious sect, the Pharisees.


"Pharisee" is derived from the Hellenized word pharisaioi, which means "the separated ones." By Jesus' day it appeared that the Pharisees had set themselves apart because they secretly believed they were spiritually superior to others. Jesus called them "vipers," "fools," and "blind guides." Stephen included them in his description of those who "always resist the Holy Spirit" (Acts 7:51).


Why was God so upset with these leaders? The reasons should be of concern to us because we grieve the Holy Spirit if we are guilty of these same sins.


Pride. The Pharisees demanded seats of honor at public events. They loved the esteem of the people and being called "Rabbi." They expected to be served, rather than to serve. Jesus exposed their arrogance in a parable that portrayed a Pharisee as boasting, "God, I thank you that I am not like all other men" (Lk. 18:11).


What a contrast to Paul's teaching in Phil. 2:1–3: "If you have any encouragement from being united with Christ, if any comfort from his love, if any fellowship with the Spirit . . . then make my joy complete by being like-minded, having the same love, being one in spirit and purpose. Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves."


Self-effort. The Pharisees trusted in their good works to make them righteous, rather than in God. They erroneously believed they could achieve spiritual blessing through the effort of the flesh. But Jesus said in Jn. 3:6, "Flesh gives birth to flesh, but the Spirit gives birth to spirit."


"Cursed is the one who trusts in man, who depends on flesh for his strength" (Jer. 17:5). "Apart from me you can do nothing" (Jn. 15:5). Scripture condemns all self-effort and warns us to beware of our tendency to act independently of God. "Are you so foolish? After beginning with the Spirit, are you now trying to attain your goal by human effort?" (Gal. 3:3).


Resistance to the Spirit. "Do not put out the Spirit's fire; do not treat prophecies with contempt" (1 Thess. 5:19–20). Guilty on both counts, the Pharisees doused the flames of the Spirit by attributing Jesus' works to Satan (Mt. 12:25–32) and thumbing their noses at the Scriptures concerning Christ.


The Pharisees' refusal to yield to the Spirit was rooted in their fear of the Spirit. The Pharisees clung to the comfort of the Law, insisting God would never work beyond the Law —at least, not without first consulting them! Jesus was surprisingly patient with their insolence and explained, "Every teacher of the law . . . is like the owner of a house who brings out of his storeroom new treasures as well as old" (Mt. 13:52). And "do not think that I have come to abolish the Law or the Prophets . . . but to fulfill them" (Mt. 5:17). Still, the Pharisees turned a deaf ear, confident God would work as He had in the past. Their failure to embrace a new work of the Spirit ultimately caused them to oppose the God they claimed to serve.


Hypocrisy. The Pharisees were spiritual leaders with no Spirit. They professed to know God yet they failed to recognize His own Son. They put demands upon others they were unwilling to accept themselves. Jesus warned, "Do not do what [the Pharisees] do, for they do not practice what they preach" (Mt. 23:3). "Woe to you, teachers of the law and Pharisees, you hypocrites! You are like whitewashed tombs . . . on the outside you appear to people as righteous but on the inside you are full of hypocrisy and wickedness" (Mt. 23:27–28). Jesus' final analysis was sad: "These people honor me with their lips but their hearts are far from me" (Mk. 7:6).


Legalism. Intellectualism was the god of the Pharisees. Consumed with order, tradition, and doctrine, they so immersed themselves in the study of God's Law and the explanation of it that they ended up missing God Himself! When the Pharisees scolded Jesus' disciples for failing to wash their hands before eating, Jesus rebuked them, "You nullify the word of God for the sake of your tradition" (Mt. 15:6).


In their zeal for theological correctness, the Pharisees reduced religion to a purely intellectual exercise, effectively squelching the Spirit and eliminating responses of the heart. Emotion was unwelcome, unless, of course, it was permitted by the Law. As a result, their hearts were hardened (Mk. 3:5). Jesus said angrily, "Woe to you . . . you have neglected the more important matters of the law —justice, mercy and faithfulness" (Mt. 23:23). Paul, himself a Pharisee, recognized the dangers of legalism and rightly warned, "The letter kills, but the Spirit gives life" (2 Cor. 3:6).


Consequences of Grieving the Holy Spirit


Grieving the Spirit carries serious consequences. The actions of the Israelites grieved the Spirit, and God withdrew His protection and fought against them (Is. 63:10, Acts 7:42–43). The attitudes of the Pharisees grieved the Spirit and they were condemned to hell (Mt. 23:13, Mt. 23:33). But the most common result of grieving the Spirit in the Old Testament was simply that He left. Prior to Pentecost, the Spirit was given to selected individuals for a temporary period of time. That is why David, who experienced the coming and going of the Spirit in his own life, pleaded in Ps. 51:11, "Do not . . . take your Holy Spirit from me."


Today, the Spirit works differently. The moment a person accepts Christ as his Savior, he is immediately indwelt and sealed forever by the Holy Spirit (Eph. 1:13–14, Jn. 14:16). We need never question our eternal destiny or doubt God's intentions toward us (1 Jn. 4:16). The Spirit will never leave us, but if we grieve Him, He may temporarily withdraw His fellowship and power. For the Christian who consistently abides in the Spirit, no consequence could be more devastating.


We cannot expect to understand grieving the Spirit apart from that aspect of the Spirit's personality that makes Him cautiously respectful of our will. The Holy Spirit never forces Himself upon us. At times, we may even wish He was more insistent, that He'd whack us on the head and shout, "Don't do that . . . it makes Me REALLY mad." Instead, He quietly, gently, convicts us of sin and leaves us to choose: Will I please Him? Or grieve Him?


To compile a list of everything that grieves the Spirit and carefully avoid each item on the list would, itself, grieve the Spirit! God doesn't want to immobilize us with a "don't do" list. And, ultimately, we'd end up trusting in a list to achieve our goal, rather than in God.


Instead, God prefers that we are continually aware of the Holy Spirit's indwelling presence and sensitive to how deeply sin affects Him, and us. It is good to understand the biblical theology of grieving the Spirit. It helps when we are able to feel God's sorrow over sin. But the surest way to avoid grieving the Spirit is to know Him and walk in a moment-by-moment, love relationship with Him. Then, grieving Him becomes unthinkable.


Copyright © 2006, The Navigators, Discipleship Journal. All rights reserved.

Friday, July 15, 2011

Good words from Joshua Harris

I loved this from Joshua Harris.  Praying and grieving IN HOPE for all of us in the Body of Christ experiencing brokeness.  Our hope is sure because our hope is in Christ who is faithful and He promises to redeem His bride.  Romans 5:5 "And hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured out into our hearts through the Holy Spirit, who has been given to us."


http://www.joshharris.com/2011/07/more_time.php

Spend more time in prayer than speculation. Spend more time interceding than choosing sides. Spend more energy loving others than arguing. Get away from the internet, get into the Scripture, go talk with God. Let's ask that he would use this season in our church to make us all more gentle, loving and broken--not more angry, self-righteous and irate. He is in this and he loves everyone involved.


It's a beautiful day outside. I'm going to go take a prayer walk.


1 Peter 3:8-9 "Finally, all of you, have unity of mind, sympathy, brotherly love, a tender heart, and a humble mind. Do not repay evil for evil or reviling for reviling, but on the contrary, bless, for to this you were called, that you may obtain a blessing."



Wednesday, April 20, 2011

Discerning the Will of God in Community

I recently had a decision to make in a difficult area of my life.  It wasn't a particularly huge decision, but it could have had notable effects.  I was leaning toward one way, but through prayer and conversations with trusted friends in the past, I knew my weakness, propensity toward sin, and blindspots in this area of my life.  I prayed and I consulted three close, discreet, discerning, God-loving, me-loving friends.  All three of them led me away from the original decision I was pondering.  Through prayer and consultation with them, I had total peace in eventually making my decision in the direction they counseled. 

My major decision making process does not always go like this.  But I have come to realize the value in going to God with my decisions and going to His people.  I want to go to God with my decisions because the more and more I walk with Him, the more and more I want my life to conform to His will for me--to honor Him.  This may be an obvious point for a Christian. 

Perhaps a less obvious point is our need for the Body of Christ.  The more and more I walk with God, the more and more I recognize the fact that I am sinful and I have weakness and blindnesses that prevent me from  seeing things as they are (this is true for you as well).  God's people can help me to see in the areas of my life where I cannot see well.  Sometimes when I sense a resistance in myself to walk in the light or seek counsel in a matter, that is a red flag that I might have hardness of heart in that matter.  This is not to say that I consult every Christian I know about everything in my life.  This is not practical, wise, or necessary.  However, there are topics that are big decisions with far reaching implications.  Or there are topics where I know I have a particular weakness or sin.  Or there are topics where I am confused at how the Scriptures would direct me.  Or there are topics in which a brother or sister has challenged me.  In these times, I have a short list of friends who I can go to--these are Christians in my life who know me well and are trusted friends.  I have seen their love for and commitment to God, His Word, and me.  They are "safe".  What I don't mean by this is that they are perfect or that they have never failed me.  What I do mean is that they are trustworthy, discreet, wise, discerning, faithful, honest, sincere, and committed.  They are willing to lovingly speak into my life in gospel way--with lasting love, with truth in accord with Scripture and with committment.  They are humble and acknowledge their own sin and weakness.  They have been vulnerable with me too.  They see my sin and weakness, and yet they look on me with love and devotion--they aren't going anywhere.  They recognize that we are all sinners in need of grace.  And they are not afraid to lovingly challenge, confront, or rebuke me, even if that is uncomfortable.  They desire God's glory and my good.

God has intended Christians to administer His grace to one another (see 1 Peter 4:10) and to build each other up in love through various things (serving one another, forgiving one another, encouraging one another, admonishing one another, praying for one another, confessing to one another, rebuking one another, etc.)

Below are some posts I have written during the period of the last 3 years.  As I was re-reading some of them, a common string I noticed among them is the role of walking in the light in community in discerning the will of God for our lives.


-----------------
Receiving Rebuke Biblically

In the last few days, I have been reading through the book of Proverbs. One of the themes that struck me the most was teach-ability, humility, and a willingness to receive instruction and rebuke. I want to have a soft-heart like that—a heart that listens to Biblical wisdom not just with my ears but with my heart and actions. I want to have a heart that is humble enough to hear and heed the loving Scripture-rooted warnings and challenges of wise brothers and sisters who love the Lord and love me. I want to have a heart that is humble enough to know its own frailty—that is prone to wander, that it is often deceitful, and that it is not always in line with the pure truth of Scripture.
Awhile after my reading in Proverbs, I stumbled onto this article from the PeaceMaker Ministries website.

http://www.peacemaker.net/site/apps/nlnet/content3.aspx?c=aqKFLTOBIpH&b=1084263&content_id={0285AEC9-A85D-4F16-95D8-A4AB8A5BB3C5}¬oc=1

I cut and pasted the article below). The article was very convicting and helpful. Sometimes I receive criticism, internalize it, and instead of looking to the cross, I drown in despair. Other times, I can overlook criticism it and continue stubbornly in my own way—justifying it to myself “They don’t understand the whole situation,” etc. Sometimes I can hear unjust criticism and feel anger or bitterness or self-righteousness toward the person giving it. I want to be a woman of wisdom and grace. I want to receive criticism—just or unjust—graciously. Let me be clear--I am not saying that all criticism is true or Biblical or given in the right way with the right heart or that all criticism is meant to be heeded. However, I want to wisely consider criticism when I receive it and prayerfully comparing it to the pure word of truth in Scripture. I want God’s Word to be my guide, but I want to humbly remember that my heart is deceptive and is in need of the accountability and counsel of godly friends. I want my heart to be humble--recognizing that my loved ones rebuke me out of love--with my interest at heart, and more importantly (and more perfectly) God rebukes me because He loves me. Even with unfounded or improperly administered criticism, I want to have a heart of sincere love for the one who criticizes me—the kind of love that looks out for the interest of the one who criticizes me. I want to have pure, noble, and lovely thoughts, speaking only what is helpful for building others up. I want a heart that lovingly pursues and seeks godly unity, understanding, and intimacy with those whom I am called to love. I know this is impossible in my own strength, but God freely gives the power of His own Spirit who is able to do this in me. Lord, I plead with you—give me this heart!

Here is the article:

The Cross and Criticism

This article originally appeared in the Spring 1999 issue of The Journal of Biblical Counseling, (Vol. 17, No. 3) and was reprinted on the Peacemaker website by permission. It is also available in booklet form.


by Dr. Alfred J. Poirier, Chairman of the Board of Directors for Peacemaker Ministries


On January 28, 1986, the space shuttle Challenger and its crew embarked on a mission to broaden educational horizons and promote the advancement of scientific knowledge. The most outstanding objective of the Challenger 51-L mission was the delivery of educational lessons from space by teacher Christa McAuliffe. A lesson was, indeed, delivered, but not one which anyone expected. Just 75 seconds after liftoff, tragedy struck. Before a watching world the shuttle suddenly erupted overhead, disintegrating the cabin along with its crew. The debris of metal, blood and bones plummeted to earth, along with our nation's glory.


What had gone wrong? That was the pressing question everyone asked. As teams of researchers examined the wreckage, the specific cause was soon found. The problem was with the O-rings (circular rubber seals), which had been designed to fit snugly into the joints of the booster engine sections. Evidently, the O-rings had become defective under adverse conditions, and the resulting mechanical failure led to the tragedy. Was that the whole story?


The truth eventually got out. The New York Times put it frankly: the ultimate cause of the space shuttle disaster was pride. A group of top managers failed to listen carefully to the warnings, advice and criticisms given by those down the line who were concerned about the operational reliability of certain parts of the booster engine under conditions of abnormal stress. Just think: heeding criticism could have saved seven human lives.


As a pastor, church leader, and lecturer for Peacemaker Ministries, I am blessed with the opportunity to minister to people and congregations in conflict.. Among the many things I've come to learn is the dominant role that giving and taking criticism has in exacerbating conflict. Yet, even more, I've learned that the remedy wonderfully provided by God requires us to return to the cross of Christ. For our present purposes, I want us to look at the problem of taking criticism.


The Dynamic of Defending Against Criticism


First of all, let me define what I mean by criticism. I'm using criticism in a broad sense as referring to any judgment made about you by another, which declares that you fall short of a particular standard. The standard may be God's or man's. The judgment may be true or false. It may be given gently with a view to correction, or harshly and in a condemnatory fashion. It may be given by a friend or by an enemy. But whatever the case, it is a judgment or criticism about you, that you have fallen short of a standard.


However it comes, most of us would agree that criticism is difficult to take. Who of us doesn't know someone with whom we need to be especially careful in our remarks lest they blow up in response to our suggested corrections? Unfortunately, as I travel around the country, the tale is often told that many people would never dare confront or criticize their pastor or leader for fear of retaliation. Many just find another organization to work for or church to attend.


In fact, don't you know of leaders who select those to be nearest to them who are easiest on them? How many times have you been warned to "walk on eggshells" around that person?


As sad a commentary as this is, such people are not much different from me. I, too, do not like criticism. Any criticism is hard for me to take. I'd much rather be commended than corrected, praised than rebuked. I'd much rather judge than be judged! And I do not think that I am alone in this. The more I listen, the more I hear the dynamic of defensiveness against criticism.


In counseling, I see it in the humorous way a couple will be diverted from the issue at hand to debate who said what, when, and where. Or in how people debate back and forth as to whether it was a Tuesday or a Wednesday when they did something.

Why do we expend so much time and energy swatting at these flies with sledgehammers? Why are our hearts and minds so instantly engaged and our emotions surging with great vigor in our defense? The answer is simple. These issues are not minor or insignificant. We defend that which we deem of great value. We think it is our life we are saving. We believe something much larger will be lost if we do not use every means to rescue it. Our name, our reputation, our honor, our glory.


"If I don't point out that I've been misunderstood, misquoted, or falsely accused, then others won't know I'm right. And if I don't point out my rightness, nobody will. I will be scorned and condemned in the eyes of others."


Do you see the idol of self here? The desire for self-justification? But idols have legs. Because of this deep idolatrous desire for self-justification, the tragedy of the Space Shuttle gets played out over and over again in our relationships. It destroys our ability to listen and learn, and it provokes us to quarrel.


Thus, for the sake of our pride and foolishness, we willingly suffer loss of friends, spouse, or loved ones. Some of that destruction comes in the shape of a thin truce. We tolerate a cold war. We make a false peace. We pledge to each other to discuss only those things which have little significance for bettering our souls. We lay out land mines and threaten the other that we will explode in anger if they so much as raise the forbidden subject of my mistake, my error, or my sin.


This is how churches split and factions develop. We surround ourselves with "yes" men—people willing to never challenge, advise, or criticize us. Yet, while we go on defending ourselves against criticism, we find Scripture teaching something different.


Criticism Commended


The ability to hear and heed correction or criticism is commended in Scripture, particularly in Proverbs. Being teachable, able and willing to receive correction, is a mark of the wise. And the wise father or mother will encourage as well as model such an attitude for their daughters and sons.


The way of a fool seems right to him, but a wise man listens to advice (Prov. 12:15).


Pride only breeds quarrels, but wisdom is found in those who take advice (Prov. 13:10).


A rebuke impresses a man of discernment more than a hundred lashes a fool (Prov. 17:10).


The ability to take advice, correction, and rebuke is not only considered a mark of the wise, and the inability a mark of the fool, but both the wise and the fool reap according to their ability to take criticism:


He who scorns instruction will pay for it, but he who respects a command is rewarded (Prov. 13:13).


Instruct a wise man and he will be wiser still; teach a righteous man and he will add to his learning (Prov.. 9:9).


He who ignores discipline despises himself, but whoever heeds correction gains understanding (Prov. 15:32).


There is gain in taking criticism. No wonder David exclaims in Psalm 141:5: Let a righteous man strike me—it is a kindness; let him rebuke me—it is oil on my head. My head will not refuse it. David knows the profit of gaining wisdom, knowledge, and understanding. He knows rebukes are a kindness, a blessing, an honor.


Ask yourself: Is that how you look at a rebuke? Is that how you perceive criticism, correction or counsel? Do you want to look at it that way?

How can we move from always being quick to defend ourselves against any and all criticism toward becoming instead like David who saw it as gain? The answer is through understanding, believing, and affirming all that God says about us in the cross of Christ.
Paul summed it up when he said, "I have been crucified with Christ." A believer is one who identifies with all that God affirms and condemns in Christ's crucifixion. God affirms in Christ's crucifixion the whole truth about Himself: His holiness, goodness, justice, mercy, and truth as revealed and demonstrated in His Son, Jesus. Equally, in the cross God condemns the lie: sin, deceit, and the idolatrous heart. He condemns my sinfulness as well as my specific sins. Let's see how this applies to giving and taking criticism.


First, in Christ's Cross I Agree With God's Judgment of Me


I see myself as God sees me—a sinner. There is no escaping the truth: "No one is righteous, not even one" ( Rom. 3:9-18). In response to my sin, the cross has criticized and judged me more intensely, deeply, pervasively, and truly than anyone else ever could. This knowledge permits us to say to all other criticism of us: "This is just a fraction of it."


Cursed is everyone who does not continue to do everything written in the Book of the Law (Gal. 3:10).

For whoever keeps the whole law and yet stumbles at just one point is guilty of breaking all of it (James 2:10).


By faith, I affirm God's judgment of myself, that I am a sinner. I also believe that the answer to my sin lies in the cross.


I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live (Gal. 2:20).

For we know that our old self was crucified with him [Jesus] so that the body of sin might be done away with, that we should no longer be slaves to sin (Rom. 6:6)


If the cross says anything, it speaks about my sin. The person who says "I have been crucified with Christ" is a person well aware of his sinfulness. You'll never get life right by your own unaided efforts because all who rely on observing the law are under a curse. "Cursed is everyone who does not continue to do everything written in the Book of the Law" (Gal. 3:10). Thus the cross doesn't merely criticize or judge us; it condemns us for not doing everything written in God's law. Do you believe that? Do you feel the force of that criticism? Do you appreciate the thoroughness of God's judgment?


The crucified person also knows that he cannot defend himself against God's judgment by trying to offset his sin by his good works. Think about this fact: whoever keeps the whole law and yet stumbles at just one point is guilty of breaking all of it (James 2:10).


To claim to be a Christian is to agree with all God says about our sin. As a person "crucified with Christ," we admit, agree, and approve of God's judgment against us: There is no one righteous, not even one (Rom. 3:10).


Second, In Christ's Cross I Agree With God's Justification of Me


I must not only agree with God's judgment of me as sinner in the cross of Christ, but I must also agree with God's justification of me as sinner. Through the sacrificial love of Jesus, God justifies ungodly people (Rom. 3:21-26).


But the life I now live, I live by faith in the Son of God who loved me and gave himself for me (Gal. 2:20).


My goal is to boast in Christ's righteousness, not my own.


No one will be declared righteous in his [God's] sight by observing the law (Rom. 3:20).


This righteousness from God comes through faith in Jesus Christ to all who believe (Rom. 3:22).


Pride breeds quarrels, says Solomon. Quarrels are often over who is right. Quarrels erupt in our idolatrous demand for self-justification. But not if I am applying the cross. For the cross not only declares God's just verdict against me as a sinner, but His declaration of righteousness by grace through faith in Christ.


The cross of Christ reminds me that the Son of God loved me and gave Himself for me. And because of this, God has thoroughly and forever accepted me in Christ. Here is how grace works: Christ redeemed us from the curse of the law by becoming a curse for us, for it is written: "Cursed is everyone who is hung on a tree." He redeemed us in order that the blessing given to Abraham might come to the Gentiles through Christ Jesus, so that by faith we might receive the promise of the Spirit (Gal. 3:13f).


What a sure foundation for the soul! Now, I don't practice self-justification, but boasting—boasting about Christ's righteousness for me.


If you truly take this to heart, the whole world can stand against you, denounce you, or criticize you, and you will be able to reply, "If God has justified me, who can condemn me?" "If God justifies me, accepts me, and will never forsake me, then why should I feel insecure and fear criticism?" "Christ took my sins, and I receive His Spirit.. Christ takes my condemnation, and I receive His righteousness."


In light of God's judgment and justification of the sinner in the cross of Christ, we can begin to discover how to deal with any and all criticism. By agreeing with God's criticism of me in Christ's cross, I can face any criticism man may lay against me. In other words, no one can criticize me more than the cross has. And the most devastating criticism turns out to be the finest mercy. If you thus know yourself as having been crucified with Christ, then you can respond to any criticism, even mistaken or hostile criticism, without bitterness, defensiveness, or blameshifting. Such responses typically exacerbate and intensify conflict, and lead to the rupture of relationships. You can learn to hear criticism as constructive and not condemnatory because God has justified you.


Who will bring any charge against those whom God has chosen? It is God who justifies. Who is he that condemns? ( Rom. 8:33-34a).


Let a righteous man strike me—it is a kindness; let him rebuke me—it is oil on my head. My head will not refuse it (Ps. 141:5).


If I know myself as crucified with Christ, I can now receive another's criticism with this attitude: "You have not discovered a fraction of my guilt. Christ has said more about my sin, my failings, my rebellion and my foolishness than any man can lay against me. I thank you for your corrections. They are a blessing and a kindness to me. For even when they are wrong or misplaced, they remind me of my true faults and sins for which my Lord and Savior paid dearly when He went to the cross for me. I want to hear where your criticisms are valid."


The correction and advice that we hear are sent by our heavenly Father. They are His corrections, rebukes, warnings, and scoldings. His reminders are meant to humble me, to weed out the root of pride and replace it with a heart and lifestyle of growing wisdom, understanding, goodness, and truth. For example, if you can take criticism—however just or unjust—you'll learn to give it with gracious intent and constructive results. See the sidebar, "Giving Criticism God's Way."


I do not fear man's criticism for I have already agreed with God's criticism. And I do not look ultimately for man's approval for I have gained by grace God's approval. In fact, His love for me helps me to hear correction and criticism as a kindness, oil on my head, from my Father who loves me and says, "My son, do not make light of the Lord's discipline, and do not lose heart when He rebukes you, because the Lord disciplines those he loves, and he punishes everyone He accepts as a son" (Heb. 12:5-6).


Applying What We've Learned


1. Critique yourself. How do I typically react to correction? Do I pout when criticized or corrected? What is my first response when someone says I'm wrong? Do I tend to attack the person? To reject the content of criticism? To react to the manner? How well do I take advice? How well do I seek it? Are people able to approach me to correct me? Am I teachable?


Do I harbor anger against the person who criticizes me? Do I immediately seek to defend myself, hauling out my righteous acts and personal opinions in order to defend myself and display my rightness? Can my spouse, parents, children, brothers, sisters, or friends correct me?


2. Ask the Lord to give you a desire to be wise instead of a fool. Use Proverbs to commend to yourself the goodness of being willing and able to receive criticism, advice, rebuke, counsel, or correction. Meditate upon the passages given above: Proverbs 9:9; 12:15; 13:10,13; 15:32; 17:10; Psalm 141:5.

3. Focus on your crucifixion with Christ. While I can say I have faith in Christ, and even say with Paul, "I have been crucified with Christ," yet I still find myself not living in light of the cross. So I challenge myself with two questions. First, if I continually squirm under the criticism of others, how can I say I know and agree with the criticism of the cross? Second, if I typically justify myself, how can I say I know, love, and cling to God's justification of me through Christ's cross? This drives me back to contemplating God's judgment and justification of the sinner in Christ on the cross. As I meditate on what God has done in Christ for me, I find a resolve to agree with and affirm all that God says about me in Christ, with whom I've been crucified.


4. Learn to speak nourishing words to others. I want to receive criticism as a sinner living within Jesus' mercy, so how can I give criticism in a way that communicates mercy to another? Accurate, balanced criticism, given mercifully, is the easiest to hear—and even against that my pride rebels. Unfair criticism or harsh criticism (whether fair or unfair) is needlessly hard to hear. How can I best give accurate, fair criticism, well tempered with mercy and affirmation?


My prayer is that in your struggle against the sin of self-justification you will deepen your love for the glory of God as revealed in the gospel of His Son, and that you will grow wise by faith.
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Dr. Alfred J. Poirier pastors Rocky Mountain Community Church, PCA, as well as serves as adjunct instructor for Peacemaker Ministries on issues involving conflict counseling and mediation. He completed his D. Min. in counseling at Westminster Theological Seminary in Glenside , PA in 2005.
Text box from the same article:

Implications for Dealing with Criticism


GIVING CRITICISM GOD'S WAY


I see my brother/sister as one for whom Christ died (1 Cor. 8:11).


Keep on loving each other as brothers (Heb. 13:1).

I come as an equal, who also is a sinner.


Are we any better than they? Not at all. For there is no one righteous...for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God (Rom. 3:9,23).


I prepare my heart lest I speak out of wrong motives.

All a man's ways seem innocent to him, but motives are weighed by the LORD (Prov. 16:2).


The heart of the righteous weighs its answers, but the mouth of the wicked gushes evil (Prov. 15:28).


A wise man's heart guides his mouth, and his lips promote instruction (Prov. 16:23).


I examine my own life and confess my sin first.


Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother's eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye? How can you say to your brother, "Let me take the speck out of your eye," when all the time there is a plank in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother's eye (Matt. 7:3-5).


I am always patient, in it for the long haul (Eph. 4:2).


Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. (1 Cor. 13:4).


My goal is not to condemn by debating points, but to build up through constructive criticism.


Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may give grace to those who listen (Eph. 4:29).


I correct and rebuke my brother gently, in the hope that God will grant him the grace of repentance even as I myself repent only through His grace.


And the Lord's servant must not quarrel; instead, he must be kind to everyone, able to teach, not resentful. Those who oppose him he must gently instruct, in the hope that God will grant them repentance leading them to a knowledge of the truth... (2 Tim. 2:24-25).


Monday, September 21, 2009

A Praying Life

I recently read "A Praying Life: Connecting with God in a Distracting World" by Paul Miller. It was so beautifully written that I underlined thoughts on nearly every page. More importantly, it is the kind of book that has changed my walk with God. It has helped open my eyes to some incorrect ways I have been viewing God that have manifested in my prayer life. I have walked away with a better understanding of what it means to have a relationship with God. The book contains helpful tools for prayer, without the guilt and legalism. The author humbly, warmly, and humorously draws from his own life throughout the book in such a way that helped me visualize application as well as helped me simply enjoy the book. In some ways, it reminded me a lot of a modern day "The Practice of the Presence of God" by Brother Lawrence. I know I will re-visit this book.

There are so many thoughts I appreciated in the book. At the end of this post is a little snippet from Miller where he talks about the role of biblical community in discerning the will of God in the details of our lives (this was not a huge part of what the book was about, but it was one of the many parts that got me thinking).

Praying and assessing our situation in light of what Scripture says is our first step in discerning the will of God in any situation in which we find ourselves. However, consulting mature believers is also an important part of consulting God-- as Scripture tells us our hearts are deceitful, our sin is deceitful, and seeking godly counsel is wise and profitable. Here are some Scriptures that discuss this concept:

Jeremiah 17: 9-10 “The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately sick; who can understand it? "I the LORD search the heart and test the mind, to give every man according to his ways, according to the fruit of his deeds."
Hebrews 13:12-13 “Take care, brothers, lest there be in any of you an evil, unbelieving heart, leading you to fall away from the living God. But exhort one another every day, as long as it is called "today," that none of you may be hardened by the deceitfulness of sin.”


Proverbs 11:14 “Where there is no guidance, a people falls, but in an abundance of counselors there is safety.”


Proverbs 15:22 “Without counsel plans fail, but with many advisers they succeed.”

Here is what Miller had to say in pages 142-144 of his book (I bolded the part that most struck me):

…we balk at praying, “God I want a vacation home. Would you get me one?” We don’t mind “acting” selfishly, but “talking” selfishly is embarrassing. After all, we aren’t little children anymore. A vacation home is so beyond the purview of daily bread that it feels presumptions to ask God for one.


So what do we do instead of asking God for a vacation home? We look at our finances, talk to a realtor, and go buy one—all without seriously praying about the decision. Don’t get me wrong. I’m not saying buying a vacation house is inherently sinful. God delights in giving his children good gifts, including vacation homes. But he wants to be part of the decisions we make. He wants our material needs o draw us into our soul needs. That is what it means to abide—to include him in every aspect of our lives.


Abiding is a perfect way to describe a praying life. For example, many Christians who are thinking of buying a vacation home might even pray, asking God practical questions, such as “Can we afford it?” “Will it be too much work?” “Should we make an offer on this house?” There are good questions. But we seldom ask God heart questions such as “Will a second home elevate us above people?” “Will it isolate us?” In the first set of questions, God is your financial adviser. In the second set, he has become your Lord. You are abiding. You are feeding your soul with food that lasts.


We can do the same thing with a promotion. It feels selfish to pray for one, so instead we will work for one! We end up separating a big part of our lives from God because we are trying to feel good about ourselves. As we have seen, we create two selves—a spiritual self and material self.


We also shy away from prayers like these because they invite God to rule our lives. They make us vulnerable. Like the crowds at Capernaum, we want breakfast, not soul food. Left to ourselves, we want God to be a genie, not a person. Scholars have pointed out that Jesus’ references to the kingdom are a subtle way of introducing himself as a king. When we pray the first petition of the Lord’s prayer, “Your kingdom come,” we are saying “King Jesus, rule my life. The heart is one of God’s biggest mission fields.


Oddly enough, we can also use prayer to keep God distant. We do that by only talking to God and not to mature believers. I can demonstrate that easily. Which is easier, confessing impure thoughts to a mature friend or to God? The friend is tougher. That feels real. We need to ask the body of Christ, Jesus’ physical presence on earth, the same questions we ask God. If you isolate praying from the rule of Jesus by not involving other Christians, you’ll end up doing your own will. Many Christians isolate their decision making the body of Christ, then further isolate themselves in their vacation homes. They say something like this: “Well my husband and I prayed about it, and the Lord seemed to confirm it. Possibly God did confirm it. It is also possible that you used prayer as a spiritual cover for “doing your own thing.” We can mask our desires even from ourselves.


Look at how Scripture and a listening heart are woven together in this hypothetical conversation with a mature friend.

Bob, my wife and I would love to get a vacation home. You know how pressured life has been for us, and it would be great to get away to a quiet place where we can unwind. We’ve found this beautiful place up on a lake that the whole family could enjoy. At the same time, we’re concerned with what it might do to our hearts. We want to be followers of Jesus, and he warns us against building bigger and better barns. Is this a bigger and better barn? Will it elevate us above people? Will it isolate us from people? Is it a wise use of our resources? Will we be limiting what we can give to others? At the same time, we think we could use our house to give vacations to people who can’t afford them. Tell me what you think.


Along with those questions, give your friend enough data to make an intelligent decision. Be open about how much it will cost, what your income is, and how it will impact your giving and savings.


One reason we don’t ask a mature friend these questions is Western individualism. Individualism goes back to the Judeo-Christian heritage all they way back to Psalm 23 and God’s tender care for me. When the Good Shepherd loves me, I have dignity and worth. I have value as an individual. But modern secularism has taken the Shepherd out of Psalm 23, leaving just me trying to create my own dignity and worth. It is my money; I earned it. I need a break. So it never occurs to me to include God or anyone else in my decision to buy a vacation home.
For more on discernment, see this post:

http://abranchinthevine.blogspot.com/2008/08/wisdom.html
For more on submission to the Body of Christ, see this post:

http://abranchinthevine.blogspot.com/2009/07/thoughts-on-submission.html

For more on walking in the light in the Body of Christ, see this post:

http://abranchinthevine.blogspot.com/2008/11/walking-in-light.html


Friday, August 1, 2008

Wisdom

Do you ever find yourself on the receiving end of conflicting advice, even from Christians? With all the voices vying for our attention, how do we know what is from God? In considering this question prayerfully through the Scriptures, I was led to the following points:

1) Consult and obey the Word.

2) Seek God’s power through prayer.

3) Recognize that there are two kinds of “wisdom”- one is worldly and one is godly.

4) Recognize the deceitfulness of our hearts and sin and humbly seek counsel.

5) Distinguish godly verses worldly wisdom by its fruit.

6) Christ is our perfect example in wise living.

1) Consult and obey the Word.

God’s Word is the standard by which everything must be tested. God’s Word is able to make us wise:

2 Timothy 3:14-17 But as for you, continue in what you have learned and have firmly believed, knowing from whom you learned it and how from childhood you have been acquainted with the sacred writings, which are able to make you wise for salvation through faith in Christ Jesus. All Scripture is breathed out by God and profitable for teaching, for reproof, for correction, and for training in righteousness, that the man of God may be competent, equipped for every good work.

Psalm 119:9-11 “How can a young man keep his way pure? By guarding it according to your word. With my whole heart I seek you; let me not wander from your commandments! I have stored up your word in my heart, that I might not sin against you.”

2) Seek God’s power through prayer.

As I am in God’s Word, I pray:

Psalm 119:34-37 “Give me understanding, that I may keep your law and observe it with my whole heart. Lead me in the path of your commandments, for I delight in it. Incline my heart to your testimonies, and not to selfish gain! Turn my eyes from looking at worthless things; and give me life in your ways.”

The Psalmist’s example tells me to seek God with my whole heart, to pray to Him for understanding of His Word, and to ask Him to keep me from wandering away from it. The Psalmist also asks God to incline his heart toward God’s testimonies (God’s Word) and away from selfish gain.

3) Recognize that there are two kinds of “wisdom”- one is worldly and one is godly.

In Psalm 119:34-37, God’s “testimonies” is related to giving life, and is contrasted against “selfish gain” and “worthless things”. Romans 12 further carries this contrast between God’s will, which is good and acceptable and perfect, and the pattern of the world:

Romans 12:1-2 “I appeal to you therefore, brothers, by the mercies of God, to present your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and acceptable to God, which is your spiritual worship. Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect.”

Clearly, there are competing interests here. On the one hand, we have the interests of selfish gain, worthless things, and the world. On the other hand, we have the interests of life in God’s ways and God’s will, which is good and acceptable and perfect. James 3 explicitly tells us that there are two types of “wisdom”, one that is earthly, unspiritual, and demonic, and another that is from above:

James 3:13-18 “Who is wise and understanding among you? By his good conduct let him show his works in the meekness of wisdom. But if you have bitter jealousy and selfish ambition in your hearts, do not boast and be false to the truth. This is not the wisdom that comes down from above, but is earthly, unspiritual, demonic. For where jealousy and selfish ambition exist, there will be disorder and every vile practice. But the wisdom from above is first pure, then peaceable, gentle, open to reason, full of mercy and good fruits, impartial and sincere. And a harvest of righteousness is sown in peace by those who make peace.”
4) Recognize the deceitfulness of our hearts and sin and humbly seek counsel

Scripture tells us that worldly “wisdom”, which is really no wisdom at all, can appear to be like the real thing so we must guard ourselves.

Colossians 2:8 “See to it that no one takes you captive by philosophy and empty deceit, according to human tradition, according to the elemental spirits of the world, and not according to Christ.
How do I examine my motives when determining whether my desires are coming from godly wisdom or of worldly “wisdom”? In examining our own motives, we must keep in mind that our hearts are deceitful:
Jeremiah 17: 9-10 “The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately sick; who can understand it? "I the LORD search the heart and test the mind, to give every man according to his ways, according to the fruit of his deeds."
To discern my motives, I must go to the Lord because my heart is deceitful and He is the only one who understands it. With the Psalmist, I must ask God to show me my heart and any wickedness there, and then to route (or re-route) me in the way everlasting:
Psalm 139:23-24 “Search me, O God, and know my heart! Try me and know my thoughts! And see if there be any grievous way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting!”

In addition to going to God in prayer, because of the deceitfulness of our hearts, God directs us to seek and heed the exhortation of godly counselors around us- our brothers and sisters who are walking in godly wisdom. This requires honesty, openness, and humility.
Hebrews 13:12-13 “Take care, brothers, lest there be in any of you an evil, unbelieving heart, leading you to fall away from the living God. But exhort one another every day, as long as it is called "today," that none of you may be hardened by the deceitfulness of sin.”

Proverbs 11:14 “Where there is no guidance, a people falls, but in an abundance of counselors there is safety.”


Proverbs 15:22 “Without counsel plans fail, but with many advisers they succeed.”


It is important also to remember we must test the wisdom of our counselors against the Word, recognizing that not all counsel is godly counsel even if it is coming from our brothers and sisters in Christ (see Job’s friends for example). For this reason it is helpful to seek counsel from multiple godly counselors.

5) Distinguish godly versus worldly wisdom by its fruit.

While Scripture contains all the wisdom I need for life, Scripture does not give me direct answers for each specific decision I face. It does not explicitly tell me what job to accept, whom to marry, or where to live. In making these decisions, we are called to discernment based on Scriptural truths. We are called to take Scriptural principles and discern our methods and applications from them within the context of seeking God’s face through spiritual disciplines such as prayer and fasting (which is a topic I hope to address in another post). So, how do we discern what is worldly “wisdom” and what is Godly wisdom in our decision making? Going back to James 3 is useful in determining this:

James 3:13-18 “Who is wise and understanding among you? By his good conduct let him show his works in the meekness of wisdom. But if you have bitter jealousy and selfish ambition in your hearts, do not boast and be false to the truth. This is not the wisdom that comes down from above, but is earthly, unspiritual, demonic. For where jealousy and selfish ambition exist, there will be disorder and every vile practice. But the wisdom from above is first pure, then peaceable, gentle, open to reason, full of mercy and good fruits, impartial and sincere. And a harvest of righteousness is sown in peace by those who make peace.”

From these two types of “wisdom” we see a difference in fruit or the results that follow. Worldly “wisdom” is accompanied by things like “bitter jealousy and selfish ambition”. Godly wisdom is “peaceable, gentle, open to reason, full of mercy and good fruits, impartial, and sincere”. Worldly “wisdom” yields “disorder and every vile practice”. Godly wisdom yields “good fruits” and “a harvest of righteousness”.

Here are more Scriptures that further point us to what are the fruit of righteousness or fruit of the Spirit verses what are the fruit of wickedness and folly:

Galatians 5:16-26 “But I say, walk by the Spirit, and you will not gratify the desires of the flesh. For the desires of the flesh are against the Spirit, and the desires of the Spirit are against the flesh, for these are opposed to each other, to keep you from doing the things you want to do. But if you are led by the Spirit, you are not under the law. Now the works of the flesh are evident: sexual immorality, impurity, sensuality, idolatry, sorcery, enmity, strife, jealousy, fits of anger, rivalries, dissensions, divisions, envy, drunkenness, orgies, and things like these. I warn you, as I warned you before, that those who do such things will not inherit the kingdom of God. But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law. And those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the flesh with its passions and desires. If we live by the Spirit, let us also walk by the Spirit. Let us not become conceited, provoking one another, envying one another.

Ephesians 5:1-21 “Therefore be imitators of God, as beloved children. And walk in love, as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us, a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God. But sexual immorality and all impurity or covetousness must not even be named among you, as is proper among saints. Let there be no filthiness nor foolish talk nor crude joking, which are out of place, but instead let there be thanksgiving. For you may be sure of this, that everyone who is sexually immoral or impure, or who is covetous that is, an idolater), has no inheritance in the kingdom of Christ and God. Let no one deceive you with empty words, for because of these things the wrath of God comes upon the sons of disobedience. Therefore do not become partners with them; for at one time you were darkness, but now you are light in the Lord. Walk as children of light (for the fruit of light is found in all that is good and right and true), and try to discern what is pleasing to the Lord. Take no part in the unfruitful works of darkness, but instead expose them. For it is shameful even to speak of the things that they do in secret. But when anything is exposed by the light, it becomes visible, for anything that becomes visible is light. Therefore it says,

‘Awake, O sleeper, and arise from the dead,and Christ will shine on you.’


Look carefully then how you walk, not as unwise but as wise, making the best use of the time, because the days are evil. Therefore do not be foolish, but understand what the will of the Lord is. And do not get drunk with wine, for that is debauchery, but be filled with the Spirit, addressing one another in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing and making melody to the Lord with your heart, giving thanks always and for everything to God the Father in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ, submitting to one another out of reverence for Christ.”

Phil 1:9-11 And it is my prayer that your love may abound more and more, with knowledge and all discernment, so that you may approve what is excellent, and so be pure and blameless for the day of Christ, filled with the fruit of righteousness that comes through Jesus Christ, to the glory and praise of God.


Col 1:3-14 We always thank God, the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, when we pray for you, since we heard of your faith in Christ Jesus and of the love that you have for all the saints, because of the hope laid up for you in heaven. Of this you have heard before in the word of the truth, the gospel, which has come to you, as indeed in the whole world it is bearing fruit and growing—as it also does among you, since the day you heard it and understood the grace of God in truth, just as you learned it from Epaphras our beloved fellow servant. He is a faithful minister of Christ on your behalf and has made known to us your love in the Spirit. And so, from the day we heard, we have not ceased to pray for you, asking that you may be filled with the knowledge of his will in all spiritual wisdom and understanding, so as to walk in a manner worthy of the Lord, fully pleasing to him, bearing fruit in every good work and increasing in the knowledge of God. May you be strengthened with all power, according to his glorious might, for all endurance and patience with joy, giving thanks to the Father, who has qualified you to share in the inheritance of the saints in light. He has delivered us from the domain of darkness and transferred us to the kingdom of his beloved Son, in whom we have redemption, the forgiveness of sins.


From these Scriptures we see that some of the fruit of wickedness and folly include: rivalry, conceit, sexual immorality, impurity, sensuality, idolatry, sorcery, enmity, strife, jealousy, fits of anger, dissensions, divisions, envy, drunkenness, orgies, provoking one another, impurity, covetousness, filthiness, foolish talk, crude joking, and debauchery.

In contrast to this bad fruit, we see the following as examples of the fruit of righteousness: love, humility, obedience, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control, filling with the Spirit, addressing one another in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing and making melody to the Lord with your heart, giving thanks always and for everything to God the Father in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ, submitting to one another out of reverence for Christ, and enduring. The one fruit that is mentioned repeatedly and seems to sum up the rest is love:

1 Corinthians 13:13 “So now faith, hope, and love abide, these three; but the greatest of these is love.”


Colossians 3:12-14 “Put on then, as God’s chosen ones, holy and beloved, compassionate hearts, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience, bearing with one another and, if one has a complaint against another, forgiving each other; as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive. And above all these put on love, which binds everything together in perfect harmony.


Galatians 5:5-7 “For in Christ Jesus neither circumcision nor uncircumcision counts for anything, but only faith working through love.”

6) Christ is our perfect example in wise living

Godly wisdom is modeled perfectly for us in Christ!

Colossians 2:8 “See to it that no one takes you captive by philosophy and empty deceit, according to human tradition, according to the elemental spirits of the world, and not according to Christ."
The life of Jesus is our perfect example of good fruit that proceeds from godly wisdom. The gospels are a great place to study the example of Christ. Here is another snapshot of Christ-like wisdom:
Phil 2:1-8 “So if there is any encouragement in Christ, any comfort from love, any participation in the Spirit, any affection and sympathy, complete my joy by being of the same mind, having the same love, being in full accord and of one mind. Do nothing from rivalry or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others. Have this mind among yourselves, which is yours in Christ Jesus, who, though he was in the form of God, did not count equality with God a thing to be grasped, but made himself nothing, taking the form of a servant, being born in the likeness of men. And being found in man form, he humbled himself by becoming obedient to the point of death, even death on a cross.”
This kind of wisdom is counterintuitive to me, as it is not the kind of wisdom I see modeled in the world!

Summary

To summarize our journey through Scripture, how can I discern which promptings are from God? Firstly, the Word of God is our gauge by which we test everything. We pray to God to illuminate Scripture for us and to enable us to glean wisdom and obedience from it. We recognize that there are competing “wisdoms” out there, and that one is godly wisdom that aligns with Scripture, is rooted in godly motives and yields good fruit, and the other is worldly or fleshly wisdom that contradicts Scripture has bad motives and results in bad fruit. We recognize the deceitfulness of our hearts and sin, and we ask God to search our hearts and reveal them to us, while we are humble and open before our brothers and sisters, seeking godly counsel that we test against the Word. Finally, we look to Jesus as our perfect model of how to live in godly wisdom.
 
Thoughts on Submission


Independence and autonomy are classic American virtues. The more I search the Scriptures, the less I see these as Biblical virtues. Rather, what I see in the Scriptures below is that God wants us to be submitted to Him. Indeed, this is what it means to be a Christian—to believe in Jesus and His Lordship and to submit ourselves to Him in worship out of a heart of love for Him. We cannot have this without humbling ourselves before Him. Submitting ourselves to Him means submitting to His Word in all things. I am starting to see that it also means submitting ourselves to His Body, as the Scriptures below indicate. Our submission to one another in general and our submission to one another within the authority structures that He has given us are to be out of reverence for Christ. A few implications of this are:

1) Our submission to others is secondary to our primary reverence for Christ. Because our submission to each other is rooted in our primary reverence for Christ, we are never called to “submit” to anyone in a way that would cause us to dishonor Christ;

2) Our submission to one another in general and our submission to one another within the authority structures that God has given us in Scripture are vital ways in which we submit to Christ Himself! This makes sense when we consider that how we treat one another in the Body is how we treat Christ Himself;
3) In our submission to one another in general and to one another within the authority structures that God has given us, we are imaging and honoring Christ who is in perfect submission to God the Father for all eternity.

4) We serve and bless others by submitting to one another by lovingly sacrificing ourselves in the interests of others.

5) We are served and blessed by others as we submit to them. Because of the deceitfulness of our hearts and our sin, we need our brothers and sisters to remind us of the Scriptures and to help us apply the Scriptures to our lives. We are in dangerous territory as isolated or “self-sufficient” Christians. Hebrews 13:12-13 “Take care, brothers, lest there be in any of you an evil, unbelieving heart, leading you to fall away from the living God. But exhort one another every day, as long as it is called "today," that none of you may be hardened by the deceitfulness of sin.”

6) Submission to one another is a way that we humble ourselves before God, but it is also a way that God cultivates sanctification and Spiritual fruit in us. When we walk in the light by exposing our hearts to one another, inviting others to speak into our lives, and living in accountability, we experience growth. Proverbs 27:17 “Iron sharpens iron,and one man sharpens another.”

Here are some Scriptures that talk about submission to one another:

Ephesians 5:15-21 “5:1 Therefore be imitators of God, as beloved children. 2 And walk in love, as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us, a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God. 3 But sexual immorality and all impurity or covetousness must not even be named among you, as is proper among saints. 4 Let there be no filthiness nor foolish talk nor crude joking, which are out of place, but instead let there be thanksgiving. 5 For you may be sure of this, that everyone who is sexually immoral or impure, or who is covetous (that is, an idolater), has no inheritance in the kingdom of Christ and God. 6 Let no one deceive you with empty words, for because of these things the wrath of God comes upon the sons of disobedience. 7 Therefore do not become partners with them; 8 for at one time you were darkness, but now you are light in the Lord. Walk as children of light 9 (for the fruit of light is found in all that is good and right and true), 10 and try to discern what is pleasing to the Lord. 11 Take no part in the unfruitful works of darkness, but instead expose them. 12 For it is shameful even to speak of the things that they do in secret. 13 But when anything is exposed by the light, it becomes visible, 14 for anything that becomes visible is light. Therefore it says,


“Awake, O sleeper, and arise from the dead, and Christ will shine on you.”


Look carefully then how you walk, not as unwise but as wise, 16 making the best use of the time, because the days are evil. 17 Therefore do not be foolish, but understand what the will of the Lord is. 18 And do not get drunk with wine, for that is debauchery, but be filled with the Spirit, 19 addressing one another in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing and making melody to the Lord with your heart, 20 giving thanks always and for everything to God the Father in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ, 21 submitting to one another out of reverence for Christ.”


Ephesians 5:22-24 “Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord. 23 For the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church, his body, and is himself its Savior. 24 Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit in everything to their husbands.”


Colossians 3:15-17 “And let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, to which indeed you were called in one body. And be thankful. 16 Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly, teaching and admonishing one another in all wisdom, singing psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, with thankfulness in your hearts to God. 17 And whatever you do, in word or deed, do everything in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him.”


Hebrews 13:7-19 “Remember your leaders, those who spoke to you the word of God. Consider the outcome of their way of life, and imitate their faith. 8 Jesus Christ is the same yesterday and today and forever. 9 Do not be led away by diverse and strange teachings, for it is good for the heart to be strengthened by grace, not by foods, which have not benefited those devoted to them. 10 We have an altar from which those who serve the tent have no right to eat. 11 For the bodies of those animals whose blood is brought into the holy places by the high priest as a sacrifice for sin are burned outside the camp. 12 So Jesus also suffered outside the gate in order to sanctify the people through his own blood. 13 Therefore let us go to him outside the camp and bear the reproach he endured. 14 For here we have no lasting city, but we seek the city that is to come. 15 Through him then let us continually offer up a sacrifice of praise to God, that is, the fruit of lips that acknowledge his name. 16 Do not neglect to do good and to share what you have, for such sacrifices are pleasing to God. 17 Obey your leaders and submit to them, for they are keeping watch over your souls, as those who will have to give an account. Let them do this with joy and not with groaning, for that would be of no advantage to you. 18 Pray for us, for we are sure that we have a clear conscience, desiring to act honorably in all things. 19 I urge you the more earnestly to do this in order that I may be restored to you the sooner.”
Ephesians 6:1 “Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right.”
Ephesians 6:5-8 “Slaves, obey your earthly masters with fear and trembling, with a sincere heart, as you would Christ, 6 not by the way of eye-service, as people-pleasers, but as servants of Christ, doing the will of God from the heart, 7 rendering service with a good will as to the Lord and not to man, 8 knowing that whatever good anyone does, this he will receive back from the Lord, whether he is a slave or free.”


1 Peter 3:1-6 “Likewise, wives, be subject to your own husbands, so that even if some do not obey the word, they may be won without a word by the conduct of their wives, 2 when they see your respectful and pure conduct. 3 Do not let your adorning be external—the braiding of hair and the putting on of gold jewelry, or the clothing you wear— 4 but let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God's sight is very precious. 5 For this is how the holy women who hoped in God used to adorn themselves, by submitting to their own husbands, 6 as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him lord. And you are her children, if you do good and do not fear anything that is frightening.”

We live in a world where people airbrush, spin, whitewash, sanitize, market, strategize, cover up, etc. Why? We live in a world where image and accolades are everything. We want recognition. We want to be adored…..


…I want recognition. I want to be adored. I want people to think well of me. I want glory. I want praise.

Praise and glory do not rightfully belong to me. All praise and glory belong to my God. He alone is worthy. He alone is sincere and righteous and pure in His own right. I am clean, but not because I have done anything righteous or pure. I am only clean because He cleansed me. He took me while I was stained and marred by sin. He took me knowing my sin (my nature, my inclinations, my actions—past, present, and future) and He paid the price for all of it. He cleansed me from the filth of it, it so that I can be pure in His sight and so that I can have peace and relationship with the One who is Pure, Holy, Righteous, and True. He is even doing the work in me to transform me into the image of Jesus the Perfect One so that I not only get “counted righteous” through Jesus’ work, but I get to experience redemption, restoration, and freedom from the sin that burdens me through the process of sanctification (shedding of sin and putting on of Christ-likeness). This is a process that God does in me, that happens gradually over a Christian’s lifetime, and that is incomplete in this lifetime. We get to experience complete freedom from sinfulness on the day that we are finally with Him in glory! What wonderful news!!!

Why then do I still want to look good in the eyes of others? Why then do I mourn damage to my reputation? Why then do I want to be liked and admired—not just so that others would see Christ in me, but so that they would see ME? This is so wrong!

Proverbs 25:27 “It is not good to eat much honey, nor is it glorious to seek one's own glory.”


Isaiah 42: 8 “I am the Lord; that is my name; my glory I give to no other, nor my praise to carved idols.”


Romans 11:36 “For from him and through him and to him are all things. To him be glory forever. Amen.”

Furthermore, when God is glorified, I have joy, peace, and hope!

Luke 2:14 “Glory to God in the highest, and on earth peace among those with whom he is pleased!”


Romans 5:1-2 “Therefore, since we have been justified by faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ. 2 Through him we have also obtained access by faith into this grace in which we stand, and we rejoice in hope of the glory of God.”

1 Peter 1: 3 “Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ! According to his great mercy, he has caused us to be born again to a living hope through the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead, 4 to an inheritance that is imperishable, undefiled, and unfading, kept in heaven for you, 5 who by God's power are being guarded through faith for a salvation ready to be revealed in the last time. 6 In this you rejoice, though now for a little while, if necessary, you have been grieved by various trials, 7 so that the tested genuineness of your faith—more precious than gold that perishes though it is tested by fire—may be found to result in praise and glory and honor at the revelation of Jesus Christ. 8 Though you have not seen him, you love him. Though you do not now see him, you believe in him and rejoice with joy that is inexpressible and filled with glory, 9 obtaining the outcome of your faith, the salvation of your souls.”

Since I want to seek His glory and not my own, it is important that I walk in the light (i.e. that I am real, sincere, and honest with God, myself, and with others rather than trying to look like someone I am not). Here are just some reasons I ought to walk in the light:

1) God commands it (see all the Scriptures below).

2) So that others might see God’s workmanship and goodness in my life despite me, and that this would cause them to give glory where it is rightfully due--to God and not to me….

Ephesians 2:8-10 “For by grace you have been saved through faith. And this is not your own doing; it is the gift of God, 9 not a result of works, so that no one may boast. 10 For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them.”

2 Cor 4:7 “But we have this treasure in jars of clay, to show that the surpassing power belongs to God and not to us.”

3) So that others might believe in God because of the testimony of what He has done in my life, and so that others would be encouraged that there is hope in Him for them too...

1 Timothy 1:15-17 “15 The saying is trustworthy and deserving of full acceptance, that Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners, of whom I am the foremost. 16 But I received mercy for this reason, that in me, as the foremost, Jesus Christ might display his perfect patience as an example to those who were to believe in him for eternal life. 17 To the King of ages, immortal, invisible, the only God, be honor and glory forever and ever. Amen.”


2 Cor 1: 3 “Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort, 4 who comforts us in all our affliction, so that we may be able to comfort those who are in any affliction, with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God.”

4) So that I would not be a stumbling block in causing despair in a brother or sister in Christ who sees a false façade of self-righteousness in me while they struggle secretly with their own sin….

Romans 14: 13 ” … but rather decide never to put a stumbling block or hindrance in the way of a brother.”


John 13:34 “A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another: just as I have loved you, you also are to love one another.”


Matthew 18:1-5 "At that time the disciples came to Jesus, saying, 'Who is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven?' 2 And calling to him a child, he put him in the midst of them 3 and said, 'Truly, I say to you, unless you turn and become like children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven. 4 Whoever humbles himself like this child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven.5 Whoever receives one such child in my name receives me, 6 but whoever causes one of these little ones who believe in me to sin, it would be better for him to have a great millstone fastened around his neck and to be drowned in the depth of the sea.' 7 'Woe to the world for temptations to sin! For it is necessary that temptations come, but woe to the one by whom the temptation comes!’”

5) To experience forgiveness and freedom in Christ….

1 John 1: 5-10 “This is the message we have heard from him and proclaim to you, that God is light, and in him is no darkness at all. 6 If we say we have fellowship with him while we walk in darkness, we lie and do not practice the truth. 7 But if we walk in the light, as he is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus his Son cleanses us from all sin. 8 If we say we have no sin, we deceive ourselves, and the truth is not in us. 9 If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness. 10 If we say we have not sinned, we make him a liar, and his word is not in us.”

6) To be aware of and to acknowledge my utter dependence on Him…

2 Cor 12:9-10 “But he said to me, ‘My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.’ Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me. 10 For the sake of Christ, then, I am content with weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions, and calamities. For when I am weak, then I am strong.”

7) To remain humble, submissive, and ready to receive God’s grace…

James 4:1-9 “What causes quarrels and what causes fights among you? Is it not this, that your passions are at war within you? 2 You desire and do not have, so you murder. You covet and cannot obtain, so you fight and quarrel. You do not have, because you do not ask. 3 You ask and do not receive, because you ask wrongly, to spend it on your passions. 4 You adulterous people! Do you not know that friendship with the world is enmity with God? Therefore whoever wishes to be a friend of the world makes himself an enemy of God. 5 Or do you suppose it is to no purpose that the Scripture says, “He yearns jealously over the spirit that he has made to dwell in us”? 6 But he gives more grace. Therefore it says, “God opposes the proud, but gives grace to the humble.” 7 Submit yourselves therefore to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you. 8 Draw near to God, and he will draw near to you. Cleanse your hands, you sinners, and purify your hearts, you double-minded. 9 Be wretched and mourn and weep. Let your laughter be turned to mourning and your joy to gloom. 10 Humble yourselves before the Lord, and he will exalt you.”

8) So that others in the body can help me (and I in turn can help them as they are honest with me about where they need help)…

James 5:13-18 “Is anyone among you suffering? Let him pray. Is anyone cheerful? Let him sing praise. 14 Is anyone among you sick? Let him call for the elders of the church, and let them pray over him, anointing him with oil in the name of the Lord. 15 And the prayer of faith will save the one who is sick, and the Lord will raise him up. And if he has committed sins, he will be forgiven. 16 Therefore, confess your sins to one another and pray for one another, that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person has great power as it is working. 7 Elijah was a man with a nature like ours, and he prayed fervently that it might not rain, and for three years and six months it did not rain on the earth. 18 Then he prayed again, and heaven gave rain, and the earth bore its fruit.”

1 Peter 4:10 “As each has received a gift, use it to serve one another, as good stewards of God's varied grace.”

1 Cor 12:4-7 “Now there are varieties of gifts, but the same Spirit; 5 and there are varieties of service, but the same Lord; 6 and there are varieties of activities, but it is the same God who empowers them all in everyone. To each is given the manifestation of the Spirit for the common good.”

9) To expose myself (motives and actions) in such a way as to enable godly brothers and sisters to speak into my life with truth as they can sometimes see what my deceitful heart refuses to see…

Jeremiah 17:9 “The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately sick; who can understand it?”


Proverbs 27:6 “Faithful are the wounds of a friend; profuse are the kisses of an enemy.”

10) So that I do not get puffed up or fall into thinking that I have reason to boast in anything but the Lord.
Jeremiah 9:23-24 Thus says the Lord: “Let not the wise man boast in his wisdom, let not the mighty man boast in his might, let not the rich man boast in his riches, 24 but let him who boasts boast in this, that he understands and knows me, that I am the Lord who practices steadfast love, justice, and righteousness in the earth. For in these things I delight, declares the Lord.”

11) So that I would not find my worth in the accolades of the world, but rather in the fact that I am a daughter of the Most High...

Genesis 1:27 “So God created man in his own image, in the image of God he created him; male and female he created them.”


John 3:16 “For God so loved the world, that he gave his only Son, that whoever believes in him should not perish but have eternal life.”

Matthew 10: 29-31 “Are not two sparrows sold for a penny? And not one of them will fall to the ground apart from your Father. 30 But even the hairs of your head are all numbered. 31 Fear not, therefore; you are of more value than many sparrows.”


Romans 8:14-17 “For all who are led by the Spirit of God are sons of God. 15 For you did not receive the spirit of slavery to fall back into fear, but you have received the Spirit of adoption as sons, by whom we cry, “Abba! Father!” 16 The Spirit himself bears witness with our spirit that we are children of God, 17 and if children, then heirs—heirs of God and fellow heirs with Christ, provided we suffer with him in order that we may also be glorified with him.”

12) So that I would worship no other God but the One True God (not myself, not my accomplishments, nor any other thing)...

Exodus 20:3 “You shall have no other gods before me.”


Dear Heavenly Father,

Please forgive me for all the ways I try to steal your glory by desiring affirmation from the world rather than from you! Forgive me for wanting to hide my sin like Adam and Eve rather than to come into the light and receive your forgiveness and restoration and to show others how gracious you are to someone like me. Help me to walk in the light. May you ever get the glory in my life as you enable me to walk in the light. May my life be an encouragement to others because of what you have done for me and what you can do for them. I love you Lord. I thank you that in your glory I get joy, peace, and hope. I thank you that the more you are glorified, the more we get to experience joy, peace, and hope. Be glorified in our lives. Help us to be real with one another—Christians and non-Christians alike. May we always be led by your Spirit in what we share with others. May your Spirit produce sincerity in us. May your Spirit produce real and sincere fruit—love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, gentleness, faithfulness, self-control and the like. Help us to stop trying to fake it. In Jesus’ Glorious Name, Amen.